Wednesday 1 February 2017

Living In The Moment

For January I decided to challenge myself to come off of Facebook for a month as I felt I was spending far too much time on there and it was a place to procrastinate. 

And I did it, yay!!

How I am not entirely sure as I am the first one to admit that I am a social media obsessor and it is basically my job to be on social media! But I have to be honest and say it was pretty refreshing, even if a little bit frustrating at times when people around me were talking about things they had seen on Facebook and I didn't have the first clue what they were on about.

The other thing I did was not start over my photo a day challenge that I was doing on Instagram. I wanted to start living in the moment and not feel like I had to be taking a photo to document as my photo of the day. I found in 2016 I was finding myself forcing activities onto us so that my photo would be good for that day, and that isn't what I want to do. 

Since doing these two things I have found that I haven't taken so many photos, which I feel bad about in a way, but I have been in that moment and I have been present. I'm not saying that those who take lots of pictures and document them aren't living in the moment as we are all different, but I wasn't. I was living behind the camera trying to make our lives more exciting, when in fact they didn't need to be but I was trying to do something that wasn't us.

I have found myself sitting on the floor playing board games with the boys and not having to stop the game to take a photo. We have been on walks where I have been present the whole time and not been distracted with 'when will be the best photo opportunity'. We have been to a cafe and had hot chocolates with no phones in sight, just the boys and I, talking about the random stuff a 3 & 5 year old talk about.

This may sound all a bit dramatic but my approach on life has changed a little bit, I am starting to go with the flow a bit more and I really like it. I am trying not to plan too much stuff to do and trying to just chill out a bit more. I was finding myself trying to prove myself to other people with photos, trying to show everyone that I am a good mum and that I do all these things with the boys. But I didn't need to. No one else matters but these two boys and what THEY think of me. And they love me whatever we do, even if it is just making them a hot chocolate at home as the praise and love I get from them is phenomenal. 

Photos are lovely but lets me honest, in 10 years time who is going to look at a ton of photos of the boys sitting watching a film, and that is the kind of thing I was finding myself taking a photo of rather than sitting with them and enjoying their hands in mine and sharing their sweets. I am also more present in the evenings, I am watching programmes and actually knowing what is going on and not having to ask Mr C what just happened. My evenings are now a bit more chilled with me catching up on some tv without me on my phone ALL night, as that is what I was doing.

Now with it being the 1st February I am back on Facebook, as lets be honest a month is enough to be out of the social media loop, but I am going to try and curb my time on it and try not to get back into old habits.