Sunday, 12 July 2015

Another Baby? When Do You Stop?

The question of another baby is one I ask myself everyday. And everyday my answer is different. When it's been a good day with the boys it's a yes, a bad day it's a solid no and then there's the days that I'm undecided.

We have had the talk and my husband would be happy either way. I'm not saying I'm not happy with us being a family of 4 but I love babies and if I'm honest I love having babies.

I am so lucky to have carried two healthy, happy boys so should I just stop there? I've said to my husband I don't feel like I cherished my last pregnancy enough to not have another baby but is that a reason to add to our family?!

There are as many pros as there are cons. One con being with 3 children and being a family of 5 the dynamics change and most activities are for a family, 2 adults and 2 children. But I have noticed lots of family tickets and activities are 2 adults and 3 children now. 

Then there are holidays. At the moment we could manage a holiday abroad, financially and emotionally, but with 3 children I think it would push it in both areas. 

At the minute there is a ratio of 1 adult to 1 child. Perfect. And I worry adding a third into the mix there will always be a stray child somewhere.

I worry a third child would be left out as the boys have and will have such a strong bond as they are so close in age.

But I can't get that niggling thought from the back of my mind that I really would love another baby. I love their smell, how tiny they are, their cry (not at 2 in the morning) and how my boys would be with a brother or sister.

I worried when I was pregnant with Noah about how I could love another human being as much as I did Finley, but you do, your love just multiplies. I have so much love to give and that feeling of love for your child is incredible.
There is no better feeling in this world than having someone love you just as much as you love them. And to have someone rely on you and need you, this is daunting too.

When do we stop?? I have sold all the baby equipment and clothes. I have told everyone no more. But deep down I'm not sure. And as my hubby said, will I always have this feeling of 'one more?'.

I do feel like our family is complete and I do wonder how we would cope with another little monster coming into our lives but my boys are worth all the tears, stress and guilt. So maybe one more?

Not now, but in a few years. Let's see.

Mami 2 Five
Mummy and Monkeys


  1. These thoughts take me back, except for me it was over weather to have a 4th child, I wanted to have even numbers, no middle 'stray' child and like you I loved having babies. We went for it, only to have triplets! I can certainly say that was a clear end for me, 6 in 6 years was so hard only now with my triplets age 11 can I say Ahhh to babies again and really mean it! The odds are so small I'm sure it won't happen to you, but this post just reminded me of my feelings back then. #SundayStars

  2. I feel exactly the same- I was thinking about it yesterday as I put some baby stuff in a box for a charity shop. My husband is a no but I think I could persuade him...... I really don't know what I want and my clock is ticking.....

  3. I am DONE! I thought I'd want loads, but after going through IVF and all the heartache I feel so blessed to have boy & girl twins. Plus I will be 40 in a few years and I don't think I could face the sleepless nights again!! Maybe, maybe, maybe - but we are so happy now with our family. Good luck deciding! It's something everyone considers isn't it? Thanks for linking up to #SundayStars Jess x

  4. So interesting reading this as I am from a family of three and would happily have had three myself. But I struggled so much with my second pregnancy - pre and post natal depression and SPD on top of looking after a toddler. I just can't do that again. I have my two beautiful girls and I am happy. I am also going to be an auntie again soon so I will be able to enjoy lots of baby cuddles without the tough parenting bits.
    Lots of luck with whatever decision you finally make and thanks for linking up with #SundayStars

  5. Your pictures are adorable, making me broody! I have the same argument with myself! There are so many reasons not to have a third BUT I can't bear the thought of not having another baby I think they'll always be that niggle x

  6. awww I like this post! There are so many things to consider and quite frankly I cannot believe how much our little beauties cost. I think we'll have one more but not any time soon. Jack certainly keeps our hands full but he is adorable. We are very lucky. To be honest, I don't think it matters how many you have as you'll always find a way to manage xx #PicknMix

  7. This post is so apt to me right now, we were discussing a 3rd child (his first) for years and kept putting it off and have pretty much decided we can't afford to plus I love our life as it is, and another 2 years both boys will be in secondary and I can finally get a full time job if the blog isn't paying me enough by is such a hard decision though isn't it?!

    Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix hon,

    Stevie xx

  8. I think you will have another...I just have a feeling hun. So much to consider but I think you would manage and maybe a little girly?? Would love to see in the future. Never say never xx

  9. Ooh always a tricky question! Both hubs and I are middle kids of 3 and growing up I always said I would only have 2 kids, because of the struggles you have mentioned, then as I got older it felt more natural to have a family of 5 and if anything dreamed of having 4 kids! But reality hit, pregnancy doesn't agree with me, terrible morning sickness and spd leaving me on crutches. I have an odd shaped uterus which means c-sections. Both our babies had colic and LM has had terrible reflux and I have PND this time. So though at 9 mths she is gorgeous and happy and I love it... The road to this point has been hard and I know I cant do it all again! Without those difficulties I think we would, as even though having 3 kids would bring challenges, hubs and I are both so close to our brothers and know that being a family of 5 def has advantages too. Thanks so much for linking with #MaternityMondays xx

  10. Oh I know exactly how you are feeling right now! I also have two boys (aged 2 and 5) and although I only ever wanted two chilldren seeing and cuddling newborns completely makes me broody for another! I am 40 in a few years too so really need to make a decision about whether to do it or not!! #PicnMix

  11. I remember being so worried when pregnant with my second how I would love another baby as much, but you do and I do with my third too. I was happy with two but when i got with my new partner we wanted one together and they both love her. It's so hard to know when you have finished. Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix

  12. We welcomed our third child 4 months ago and it has so far been the hardest 4 months of my life but I love him so and our family is now complete and we are looking forward to things getting a little easier and being a great family. It took a year of yes/no before we said yes lets have a third and another 6 months before I said 'ok i'm ready to be pregnant again'. We are definately done now. #maternitymondays



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