Like every mum I want to do everything right for my sons. I want them to grow up knowing how much they were loved and to look back on their childhood and smile. And for them to come to my husband and I when they are adults and talk fondly of their childhood.
I think sometimes I put too much pressure on myself to 'do it right'. What is right? I don't think there is a singular right way, it's the right way for you and your family.
We didn't start reading bedtime stories until Finley was about 2 years old - just because he didn't have the attention span to listen to a story and would get bored. So we would sit with him while he had his milk and then do kisses and cuddles goodnight. When taking to other mummy's with children the same age they would tell me which books were their childrens favourites and how many books they read them a night and the how their children loved bedtime story time.
I used to worry constantly about maybe Finley was missing out. Should we be reading him a bedtime story? Would it slow his development down? Would he look back and think I never got a bedtime story when I was 2? And I would stew on all these questions and beat myself up and wonder was I doing it right. But in fact, bedtime stories didn't come to our house until Finley was about 2 1/2, when he was really interested in books and after Christmas 2013 when I did an advent calendar of books for him. And this was right for us.
Bedtime story time
I now look back and think how stupid of me to worry about not reading him a story as he didn't want one and in my eyes he wasn't ready.
I spend most of my parenting life worrying. Whether I'm feeding them right, whether they watch too much tv, do we go to soft play enough, do we go out enough? The list is endless.
With Finley I read a lot of parenting books and google. I put so much pressure on myself to do what the books or google said as I thought this was the 'right' way. But with Noah I learnt to go with my gut and to follow what I thought was right and I am so much more of a relaxed parent because of this.
I used to worry about when Finley would nap. In the books it says they should have 2 naps of 1 1/2 hours each at a year old. So I would spend half my morning sat trying to get Finley to sleep and after an hour of trying he would go, same in the afternoon. All this because I thought the book was right. Then with Noah because I didn't have the time to sit and get him to sleep he slept when he wanted, he still does, and you know what he sleeps through the night and sleeps so well.
Noah falls asleep when he wants, lol
But we live and learn and I have learnt to listen to my instincts and really I am the best book of knowledge for myself. And I truly wish I didnt worry so much and worry what other people think but that is me.
I want to get it right for my boys. And I hope I look back in 20 years time and think I did it right and it was what was right for us.